Lets talk about Body Dysmorphia.
I have a hell of a lot of body confidence 95% of the time.
That other 5% my mind fucks me hard.
Unfortunately that 5% is a result from when I was severely overweight, developing body dysmorphia.
How I can easily explain it, is that if im not directly looking into a mirror or reflection, my mind perceives my body that its still the 120kg girl I once was.
The last major trigger was the 5kg weight gain and comp photos. Healthy weight gain mind you.
Like a light switch, my brain immediately saw the flaws, the imperfections, the weight I had gained and how my belt sat.
I had picked myself apart in the matter of 10 seconds.
I had dove straight back to negative self sabotaging behaviours like Ive done in the past.
It hit me in the feels SO HARD, I bawled my eyes out for ages.
The negativity that I let consume my mind overtook the positives and the outcome of the day.
Deadlifted 150kgs
Achieved new PBs
Performance was on point
Amazing mental clarity
Ability to switch on and off to perform
I’m no longer allowing certain things to trigger it, learning to control my thoughts and focusing on the positives.
What is it?
Body Dysmorphic Disorder is classed as a mental illness that can usually be misdiagnosed or left undiagnosed.
It's the constant worrying or perceived perception about how one looks or defects of the body.
A person with BDD tends to compare their appearance to others or constantly check their reflection on all surfaces. To obsess or imagine flaws.
The preoccupation of how one thinks of themself can be extreme and can cause severe emotional distress, depression, anxiety and also suicidal tendencies.
What Causes it?
It is likely a combination of environmental, biological and neurological factors.
It can stem from negative childhood situations such as bullying/teasing, low self esteem, anxiety or depression and social pressures.
Recognising some signs of BDD:
Negative thoughts about body image
Comparison
Asking for reassurance about looks and not believing the answer received
Avoiding any reflections or Covering up mirrors
Constantly looking at their reflection
Over exercising or under eating - this can then potentially turn into eating disorders
The want/need for cosmetic/plastic surgery to treat the issue
Depression, anxiety and also can include suicidal thoughts.
Low self esteem
Compulsive behaviours
Attempting to hide the “flaws”
Avoiding social situations
Where you can get help:
Recognising some of the signs above can in turn help a friend or family member, someone close to you or even yourself.
Reach out to the below for help.
GP
Psychiatrist
Psychologist
LifeLine
Beyond BLue
